This has been a very long and interesting journey. Sometimes more interesting than others, and sometimes sad. Especially when we lost my mother, who was the single most interested person to see this baby coming into the world.
The attempts to get pregnant, talking to doctors in Switzerland, their views about it. They always said that we should not worry about getting pregnant too much, it would automatically happen when the couple is not so tense. That perhaps happened exactly the way. By end of feb/march we were bit tired of trying and had given it up on the mother nature.
The initial three months of pregnancy were spent in Switzerland. It was a mixture of happiness and anxiety, put together with nervousness of not doing anything wrong. But then it turned out alright, when we completed the first trimester without any issues.
Then came possibly the worst news one could expect when expecting a new member of the family. My mom passed away during the second trimester, and we had to rush back to India immediately.
Afterwards, nothing was same in our lives. The normal life, the pregnancy, everything was different then. We were missing her in lot many ways, especially the part that an elder has to play when there is a expecting female in the house. To a large part, her mom filled in, but nobody can replace another person, and so we still miss her in many ways.
Recently, when there were talks and discussions about having a normal delivery or a surgery, her presence was missed the most. She would have had her own opinion, and probably would make a lot of difference to the situation we stand in today.
When the baby was born, and I saw him for the first time, the first thing I felt was, “Oh god, her wish is fulfilled, if only she was present today to witness this.” It was a baby boy, something she wished for a lot, since my generation of people in our family only has daughters. It was much sought after.
We miss you mom, and will keep missing you. Probably, his arrival to our lives will only strengthen the absense we feel for you.